There may not be such a thing as a good divorce. However, divorce does not always need to be as contentious as it appears in movies and TV shows. You cannot control every aspect of your divorce, but there may be some ways you can help make divorce a little easier.
Consider the best process for your situation
When most people think about the divorce process, they picture going in front of a judge who will make decisions about what should happen for the divorce to be fair. However, understanding that divorce does not always need to be a battle can be the first step toward an easier divorce.
Litigation may be appropriate in some situations, but it may not always be necessary. An alternative dispute resolution process, such as mediation, may be a calmer process than litigation. If you and your spouse have decided to end your marriage, it can be valuable to familiarize yourselves with all the ways you can go about doing so. When you fully understand your options, you may be better able to select the process that is best for your situation.
Show mutual respect
It is important to know what is fair and advocate for your rights, but it can also be helpful to treat your soon-to-be ex with respect. If you and your spouse can agree to show mutual respect throughout the process, there is a good chance your divorce will be less stressful for everyone involved. Remaining civil may even help you reach more of the outcomes that matter to you.
Agree to prioritize the kids
Children often have a difficult time adjusting to their parents’ divorce. Divorce causes many changes to a child’s life, but one of the most damaging aspects of divorce can be the exposure to parental conflict.
Parents can help kids cope with divorce by:
- Settling disagreements at a time and place that prevents children from seeing or hearing any potential conflicts
- Breaking the news about the divorce when the whole family can be present
- Explaining divorce in an honest, but age-appropriate way
- Not making negative comments about the other parent to the children
Every family’s situation is different, and the best divorce strategy depends on the unique situation. However, if you are willing to consider your divorce process options, act in a respectful manner and prioritize your children, you are likely to have a better divorce experience than you otherwise might.